Writing Plus Some Odds & Ends

Happy Tuesday all ! I hope everyone is having a super week. I know my teacher buddies are so thrilled to be back at work, NOT, LOL ! I meant to do a blog post last night but I got busy packing up my sales from the weekend for my dad to take to the post office. He is my super ebay helper. It is so crazy in the Decatur post office by McDonald's that I would spend my entire lunch just standing in line. So my very retired dad takes them to Danville for me. He is big buds with the ladies that work up there. He is such a flirt, silly old man, lol. My scrapbook stuff is selling well and that makes me super happy. I think I am going to start a little stash to save for a laptop. I need a computer that can be portable. I am too tied and have too much going on to be without my computer.

I have been thinking so much the last few days about writing. I have never really talked about it to anyone, but it is something that I have always thought of doing. My wonderful high school English teacher, Mrs. Fleming, used to tell me all the time that I had a gift. I never really believed her though. I used to read books & magazines about getting published right after I graduated from UNA, when I was having trouble finding a teaching job. Things started changing for me and I lost a lot of myself for quite awhile, especially when I was engaged. Then I had all the job and house drama so it just seemed so trivial, I didn't give it much thought. It was always a pipe dream. There were always more important things to worry about. For some reason though, for the last few weeks, I have had this urge building inside me. I know this might sound crazy, but its like all the words & stories are forcing their way out. I have had very specific characters in my head for years. I honestly don't know for how long. I think it all started when I was about 14 or 15. I was such a brooding lonely teenager who had no life. I was scared of my own shadow and hid from people as much as possible. So to make up for, I made up the characters in my head. They said and did all the things that I couldn't. These characters have stayed with me all these years, growing and changing and merging along the way. To tell these stories doesn't even seem like writing, like work to me. It is like television, I would just me writing down everything that I have seen and heard. Why am I so scared to just start typing then. Again, I know this sounds crazy, but it makes me feel so venerable. It is so intimate to me, to put these parts of me on paper. To have anyone read it would mean me being totally exposed. What if no one understood? What if everyone thought it was stupid? What if it just plain sucked. lol?

For some reason, I was just so crazed today, I just started typing this morning. Within 30 minutes, I had 6 pages of a story, or really more of a conversation, between 2 people. I don't even know where it came from. It was so thrilling and so terrifying at the same time when I printed them out. To see the words in black and white on a page was a real rush. I don't know what I was thinking. Paige kept asking me what was I up to. Then I did something totally insane. I actually handed it to her and told her to read it. I didn't tell her what it was or where it came from. I think she thought I had just printed some mess off the internet. She came back in a few minutes with a shocked look on her face. "You wrote this didn't you". I felt like I was standing buck naked in the middle of the beltline, LOL. I fessed up but told her not to be nice and tell me she liked it, I wanted to hear the brutally honest truth. She said she could tell it came from me. She could see me in the girl in the story. She was upset, she thought what I was writing about had really happened to me. I tried to explain all this mess to her but she just kept shaking her head. She said it was just like picking up any other book and reading it. Now granted, I don't always trust Paige's opinion & she is way more nice than I am when it comes to telling the truth, but she wasn't lying. She really did like it. She really did think it was good. She said I am insane if I don't do something about it. I think I might hyperventilate, LOL. It also doesn't help that I have an audience of English teachers, lol. I can just imagine what they would do to my grammar and punctuation.

Ok, so that is enough crazy mess for today. I do know that I feel this undeniable urge to write. So I guess I will try and go with it. Wish me luck. It is the scariest thing I have ever done. I hope everybody has a great week. I hope the kids at Tanner don't come back too wound up on Thursday. Chow for now !!