I am so happy to see so many of my friends completing these lists. We should all help and encourage each other along these journeys. I think it will help all of us to focus on the things that are truly important and what makes us really happy.

I was so inspired when I read Amanda's blog today. I know how she feels about being in a dark place and losing faith. I have never had any self-esteem. I have always felt like I was never good enough. Then I lost my job at Family Security. I can honestly say that being fired is one of the most humiliating and hurtful experiences ever. I wouldn't wish it on anyone. Plus if you have a low opinion of yourself like I did, it hurts even more. It took over 5 months to find another job. This one was at Compass Bank. Just as I started feeling a little more sure of myself, I starting getting sick. The Dr's couldn't figure out what was wrong. After 10 days off and on in the hospital, they decided to remove my gall bladder as a last resort. Well, that was too late for Compass. They fired me too. Again, I thought I had hit rock bottom. Oh no, the worst was yet to come. To make a long boring story short, my medical insurance was cancelled while I was still in the hospital, before I was actually fired. The hospital stay, tests and surgery were not covered under my insurance. I was left with over $50,000 in medical bills. Not to mention that my finances were already a shambles from being out of work for so long. I was told by my attorney that the only option I had was to declare bankruptcy. That meant losing my house. I could have dealt with losing the building, but it was my grandparents old house that I had inherited. I had taken out a mortgage to make all the improvements to make it livable again. No I had to face the fact that I was a failure and a disappointment yet again. I had to move back home with my parents, I had no where else to go. It was the darkest time of my life. I thought many days that the world would be much better off without me, that I was just a drain on everyone.

My story does have a happy ending though. Through hard work, faith and prayer, I have finally realized that I am NOT a loser or a failure or a disappointment to anyone. The world would be a must more boring place without me, LOL. My parents have been wonderful. I still live with them and I am going to stay there as I plan and save toward building my dream house. My friends also played a big part, probably more than they will ever know. There are no words or actions to express how much their love & support means to me. I no longer hate Family Security or Compass for what happened. My lord, if it hadn't been for the old FSCU, I wouldn't ever have met my wonderful friends. Letting go of the anger helped me to heal. I wasn't only hurting myself by filling my thoughts and my life with spite, bitterness and hatred. It was making me a sick and miserable person. I was also so blessed to find the most wonderful job purely by accident. I came to Dr. Hardy's office just as a temporary fill-in for a maternity leave. I found my home there. He is the most amazing boss that anyone could ask for. He inspires all of us to work harder for him because he appreciates & rewards us. I wish everyone could work in as wonderful an work environment as I do.

The moral to the story is have faith and never give in to the pain. Let the anger, hurt & resentment go. You will never change the past or anything that has already happened. Dwelling on things will only hold you back from happiness in the future. I also highly recommend the book "The Secret" by Rhonda Byrne. I found it so inspiring. It really changed the way I look at my life and my power to control what happens around me. Now I am through with my venting for the day. Sorry I ran on so long. And you were right Amanda, blogging is cheaper than therapy, LOL!!!